Thursday, July 04, 2013

Mum's Diary: The "Bursting-At-Seams" Confidence

Transiting to Primary One is a big deal for kids. It's the beginning of formal education in Singapore and for many of the kids, it's their first encounter with serious and intensive studying. Apart from the kid feeling the stress and heat, the parents usually get stressed up and nervous as well, especially if it's the first time for them. I started this series to document the chronological order of events, my intimate thoughts and emotions on this journey, and it will continue until Joey settles down in Primary One. Hopefully, as we go along, the posts would become more and more positive and encouraging. I do believe in that. :)

3 July 2013

I remember as a Primary School kid, I've always wanted to be the School Prefect.

For ego or vanity, I can't remember. But I do remember hoping that I could be one of those prefects strutting around with the badge, doing morning duties guiding the students to their classrooms, and keeping the class quiet and obedient while the teachers were in between classrooms. It felt like a really cool thing to do.

Fast forward 20+ years, and I see my girl behaving in the same way as I did.

Except, she's got more guts than I ever had.

Term 3 has just started this week, and she came home today telling me that she would be asking her Form Teacher the next day why she hasn't been made the Class Monitor yet. Apparently, she was very unhappy when the Teacher chose another girl (fate has it that it was her best friend) to be the Class Monitor last Term. She was hoping and praying that she would be chosen, and when it didn't happen, my very feisty girl went straight to the Teacher and told her as-a-matter-of-factly that she wants to be the Class Monitor. I don't really know how she brought that message across to her Teacher and in what tone and phrasing, but I certainly hope it was not rude or arrogant. I do admire her frankness but know I would never do something like that. I am too proud for that quite frankly. If I didn't get chosen, I would pretend I didn't care for it. My girl obviously thinks otherwise and the Teacher told her that she will consider making her one the next term.

I didn't make it to the Meet-the-Parents session last term, so I got Joey's Form Teacher to send me an email evaluation of her. More than her academic performance, I was more concerned about how she was behaving in Class and interacting with her classmates. Does she have friends in school, and who does she hang out with usually? Joey tells me what she does in school but I wanted to know if it was all true and whether there were anything the Teacher noticed that perhaps Joey didn't tell me about.


The Teacher's email was kind of reassuring. She said Joey's a little careless sometimes but copes well with her learning. She also has a group of friends she hangs out with everyday (And yes, the Class Monitor included of course), and she is seen to be helpful to her other classmates. As expected, she always raises her hand to answer questions and is able to give good suggestions and ideas during discussions. BUT, because she can be quite bossy at times, the Teacher is hesitant to make her the Class Monitor despite her showing obvious leadership qualities. I am very glad to see that the Teacher has made such an observation, and really hoping that Joey can learn to tone down on her bossiness and listen more to her friends. Bossy people have few friends and that is the thing that worries me the most.

It is so true that as the kids grow older, there are more things we have to worry about. More than whether they are eating, sleeping or pooing well, the issues that I think about now make my heart ache and give me sleepless nights. As the Chinese saying goes, "养儿一百年, 长忧九十九." (Raising a son for a hundred years and worrying for ninety-nine of those years). Parenting requires a strong and wise heart. There are only so much we can do as parents to prepare our kids for life's challenges, and the truth is we will not be by their side forever. I can only pray that my kids will have the wisdom of the Lord to guide their every step. Most of all, I want them to be happy. That should be the ultimate wish in every parent's heart?

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